The Vessel


The Vessel

Character is destiny. You are fascinating enough to be questionnaired by The Mind’s Construction. Starting with where and when you were born, could you briefly describe your life up to this point?

By the English channel, late sixties.
My headmaster at the age of 7(?) called me the laziest boy in the school. This, at the time seemed a surprising and harsh observation for leaning on my hand on the desk. Increasingly, however, I have begun to attribute powers of insight to the late Mr. Downey. Had he seen my innate talents that my tardiness suppressed or was it just his way to use shock tactics? This was the man, after all, who sent me to wash my mouth out with soap after my best friend stamped on my foot. Whatever the expletive I blurted it was so instinctive that I don’t recall making one but I presume this is what lead to my suggested punishment/penance. I do remember making my way through the canteen/gymnasium/whatever you want to use it for area into the connecting corridor and onto the toilets. Such was his ferocity I wet myself and I dimly recall explaining to someone else in the toilets why I was
there. I should like to point out that this was an ordinary catholic primary school. Mr. Downey was a very angry Irishman. He did on another occasion make me stand up while the entire school applauded me as an all conquering hero because I had won the DISTRICT SPORTS SACK RACE by a good 15 yards and this from the laziest boy in the school. My victory was down to my technique of putting my feet in the corners and running. A metaphor for how I have got to where I am today.

There is no progress. Yet time relentlessly pursues you in one direction or another. If you were plotting your life’s trajectory on a graph, what would the line look like?

I prefer to think of it as a carpet that is unrolling (red).

Keep that line in mind. Describe the zenith. Relate the nadir.

Zenith was Phil Manzenera being very glamorous with his beautiful wife at our after-show.

Nadir – that outfit and the funny dance I do in the cookie video

Consciousness is a mere ripple on the surface of the lake that is our mind. Tell me last dream you can remember having.

Crowd surfing at Wembley stadium (doh).

Truth is felt by instinct, a process which saves time and trouble. Choose – instinctively – from these:

Satisfied Fool or Dissatisfied Socrates?

Dissatisfied fool.

Skimmed Milk or Full Fat?


Boys or Girls?


Standing Up or Sitting Down?

Standing up.

Mum or Dad?


Bookmarks or Folded Corners?

Hate both use memory.

(If you had to be) Blind or Deaf?

Ha ha am going deaf.

Poetry or prose?


Atheist or Believer?

God knows.

Does the mind rule the body or the body rule the mind?

I don’t know.

Animal, Mineral or Plant?


There’s no art to find the mind’s construction in the face. What are the differences between your external appearance and your internal make-up?

I think my face is a good reflection of my internal make-up, even when I’m wearing make-up.